[023] OOM - The truth about his birth

[tristranthorn]

Tristran can vaguely remember the Seventh Magpie being so crowded -- it's happened only once before in his lifetime, and he had been very young then. When he makes his way back through the bar, he has to move carefully, weaving his way past people -- Wall-folk and other strangers alike -- eating (lambchops, bacon, mushrooms, fried eggs, black pudding) and drinking (ale, mead, lager) to reach the exit.

The conversation had gone strangely. Or - well. It went a lot more differently than he ever would have expected it to have gone. His original vision of this fateful day was as follows:
He would get himself back into Wall with a celestial rock in his pocket and find Victoria at her house. Or maybe in front of it (it didn't really matter so much, so long as she was there). He would bend down on one knee before her and reveal the star to her in a gallant fashion like some grand hero. And she would beam and giggle and smile at him. She would wrap her arms around him and he would kiss her and ask her to marry him and they would live happily ever after from then on.

Now, everything is different. Now not only is that dream far away, but it is nonexistent. And the very thought makes him unimaginably happier than he would have believed many months ago. Imagine being stuck here -- in some place where he really doesn't belong -- with Victoria, knowing she would never truly be happy with him. And he with her. He realizes now, quite clearly, that he really could never be happy with all of the things he once wanted. It was all a dream, an ideal his foolish mind had woven because he was young and infatuated and silly.

He is now a man, and he is a man in love. It just so happened to go all -- well, wrong (unplanned), and unexpected (a complete surprise) and ... strangely, he doesn't mind at all. His heart feels lighter.

He wants to tell her. He wants to shout it to the world --

"Tristran."

As he whirls around, his eyes land on a man far older than him rising as they meet eyes. He comes over to younger man and clasps him on the shoulder without speaking.

It is Tristran who breaks the silence. "Father," he says. "You -- you look good."

Comments

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"So what have you two been doing, disappearing for so long?" Louisa asks, bumping Tristran in the side with her hip, teasingly.

"Mummy and I were beginning to suspect the two of you were plotting something."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Your brother and I were having a consultation with the fugitives in the attic."

His voice is factual and the response comes without any hesitation, much like the effortless motion away from the reach of her towel.

"You would have been impressed with his skills in negotiation," a grin. "Especially when the topic of your room was brought up."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Don't tease your daughter," Daisy's quiet voice states, a bit sternly but just lightly enough to know that she's not too serious about the matter.

Another dish gets rinsed an passed down.

"Though you may take her - as I have more than enough help now."

[tristranthorn]

Tristran laughs quietly at the exchange, drying off the next dish without comment as he tries not to look in his mother's direction. Knowing too much suddenly seems a disadvantage as much as it is a good thing.

Louisa wipes her hands off on her apron and steps away from the kitchen sink to join their father at the table once more, while Tristran remains where he is.

"I wouldn't believe you anyway," Louisa says haughtily. "I'm not five years old, you know."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Could have fooled me," Dunstan replies with a laugh - and Daisy rolls her eyes indulgently as the two of them continue to bicker mildly in the background.

She hands him another dish, voice still that same low patter of speech - but a bit lighter now, more cheerful.

"I do hope that you treat your young lady more politely than that one does."

[tristranthorn]

"I do," Tristran replies automatically, hair falling into his face as he looks down at the rest of the dish stack. "Well, I try, anyway."

He takes the dish, grateful to have something to do with his hands - it alleviates a lot of the awkwardness. And it doesn't particularly faze him that she knows things.

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"I didn't expect any less," she smiles.

Her chin stays low, back straight, nothing short of proper.

"You may ask questions, you know," she continues, with a great deal more effort than the simplicity of the statement implies. "I am, perhaps, not as good at all this as your father, but I will try."

[tristranthorn]

How exactly does one ask the woman who's taken care of him all his life just how she dealt with it, knowing he was not really her son?

"I - I'm not really sure what sort of questions to ask," Tristran admits, his voice low. "I suppose I always just assumed that ..." His voice trails off. That she didn't love him so much as tolerated his presence.

He unknowingly continues to wipe the same plate dry, his mind lost in thought.

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"I think I worried more that she would come back for you," she replies, answering his unasked question with an easy sort of accuracy. "For him too, a bit."

She laughs quietly, a shared nervous habit, and her hands still in the soapy water.

"Him I could hold, perhaps. But you? You were not mine, and I - I worried."

She does that often.

[tristranthorn]

His heart slowly begins to pound in his chest upon hearing that. It is clear how surprised he is, how unexpected those words are.

But somehow he's ... well, the feeling is quite unexplainable. All these years ...

He puts the dish down, and with it, the rag.

"You don't have to worry," he says, turning his head to look at her now. "Mum."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

She reaches out carefully and squeezes his fingers lightly with one soapy hand, glancing briefly upward, clearly satisfied with what she sees.

"You worry too much, Tristran," she says, and then smiles slightly. "You get that from me."

Her chin tilts again and she pats the back of his hand once more before continuing to wash - she's never really been one for very many words.

[tristranthorn]

"I suppose I do," he says in agreement, smiling too.

They finish with the rest of the dishes, and then he helps them finish little chores about the house as he used to when he had lived here before. Once the horses have been fed, and some of the broken furniture mended, the family gather once more at the kitchen table.

Things are different now. Somehow he has the feeling that he can no longer live here, even if Yvaine agrees to live with him here, in Wall. He knows she could never be happy here, and neither could he.

It is time to tell them good-bye.

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

Dunstan turns his head back from the view out of the window - seated easily, with one arm resting along the back of his wife's chair.

"It's going to be getting dark soon," he says, looking back across the table with a knowing smile. "Shouldn't be leaving your young lady alone at night."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Young lady?" she asks, blinking in surprise. "Wait - Tristran has a young lady?"

Louisa narrows her eyes, glaring impressively, and thwaps him neatly on the shoulder.

"Tristran!" she scolds. "You didn't tell me you had a young lady!"

[tristranthorn]

Tristran instinctively leans back, but still gets hit anyway, letting out an 'Ow!' and laughing.

"Yes," he says to his sister. "I do, actually." He nods to his father. "And you're right - I suppose I ought to be getting back to her soon."

He clears his throat, amused expression immediately sobering. "But first, I just wanted to say a couple of things."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Louisa," Daisy warns mildly and the indignant sputtering ceases, settling into a quiet discontented sort of sulk.

It's hardly fair that no one tells her things.

Dunstan, on the other hand, just remains silent - settling back and gesturing for him to continue. They're listening.

[tristranthorn]

He swallows, only slightly uncomfortable with all of the attention turned on him. It is hard to do this, but he knows it must be done.

"I - well, once I left Wall and went into Faerie, I learned a lot," he begins. "I've discovered so much - it's quite ... it's something else. Unexpected. Magical." He has to avoid looking in Louisa's direction. It had been her who berated him for much of his childhood because of some of the things he used to talk about.

"The lady I've met, she's ... she belongs to that world." He lets that sit for a moment before adding, "And so do I, I think."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Maybe that is what you left to find then," Dunstan replies simply, nodding in apparent understanding. "Even if it may not be what you had intended upon looking for."

Most of the right things aren't.

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

Daisy shifts slightly and does that strange, overly watery thing that makes Louisa purse her lips, sighing out a quiet "Mother." and leaning across the table slightly to pat her hand.

"Really magical?" she asks then, quietly and perhaps a bit apologetically.

It's strange, almost, how it's easier to believe him now that she's no longer a child.

[tristranthorn]

Tristran turns to look from his father to his sister, his eyes eventually resting on his mother's, watching her for a moment and seeing her in a completely different light. There is a vague sense of regret for the misunderstanding he'd lived with for all his life.

"Really magical," Tristran confirms, glancing at Louisa once more.

"I don't ... think either of us could live here." He pauses. "Everything's completely different. There are things unimaginable over the other side of the Wall, things that no one can even begin to explain. And the girl I met, well ... I can't leave her." And he wouldn't want to.

He hesitates. "I think what I'm trying to say is ..."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"That you'll invite us to the wedding?"

He grins as he receives identical glares, lips quirking up into a crookedly charming smile and arms crossing over his chest.

"You don't get rid of family, Tristran," he says. "You know where to find us when you need us."

[tristranthorn]

He raises his eyebrows in surprise.

"I - well, of course," he says with a nervous laugh. He had - never really thought it out that far.

Then shaking his head, he clears his throat. "I'd never get rid of you," he says. He's really quite terrible at this, but he's going to try anyway. "You're all very important to me. I mean - well, I'll miss you. And ... I'd like to think that wherever we end up, you'll ... you'll be able to visit. And we'll visit you."

It's actually not goodbye at all.

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

You don't say goodbye to family.

Well, at least it's much more difficult to say goodbye to them when certain members of it are wrapped around your arm.

"Of course you will miss us," she says brightly, because she's certainly not crying. "You will be utterly miserable without anyone to beat you up properly."

[nosequels.livejournal.com]

"Ah," Dunstan corrects, smiling widely at his son before glancing at his daughter. "From what I hear she has better aim than you do."

Louisa huffs and Daisy laughs a bit, still quietly, before replying.

"You are welcome back whenever you wish, of course. It's always good to have somewhere to return to."

[tristranthorn]

Tristran laughs, but his throat is full of emotion. He pulls his sister closer and gives her a hug.

"I believe I've grown out of most of that, anyway," he tells her, then kisses her cheek affectionately. (Not to say that would ever stop Yvaine though.)

He lets go of her, then turns to his parents, heart swelling with gratitude.

"Dad. Mum. Thank you - for everything."